#singlegirlproblems

Well now that Taylor so nicely put my sex encounter out in the open, I might as well explain why I'm depressed today....I feel like such a whore...

I haven't had sex in seven months. Seven. I stopped when I met this guy that I was really into. We've always had a flirtatious friendship. I've been wanting him to ask me out but he never did. I was at my party last night and I decided to text him to tell him Happy Valentine's Day. The conversation led to him asking me if I wanted to come over so he wouldn't have to spend Valentine's Day alone. Why the hell would I pass that up?

So I got to his house and we picked out a movie to watch [in his room]. At that point I kinda figured something was going to happen. We weren't cuddling unfortunately. I was just lying there, very stiff from being so nervous. He was laughing at me because of it. He then pulled the same thing one of my first boyfriends did on our first date - "I think I know something that will make you not so nervous"......he kissed me. Well one thing led to another, and yeah...

Don't get me wrong, I loved every second of it. I can honestly say that he was the best I ever had. I couldn't stand up for a long period of time because my legs were shaking so hard so he basically carried me to the car. He kissed me goodnight, and that was that. We never discussed if he had feelings for me or that I have feelings for him.

I was fine at first, but when I woke up this morning, I started freaking out. I don't want it to be awkward with him the next time I see him. I don't want to be just another girl he hooked up with. I think I just need to text him and tell him I don't want to see him again. I would rather end things now, than get hurt down the road.